To keep you updated & informed!
By Emily N.
This interesting age old subject came to my attention over a month ago when I sat back and did some people watching at one of our singles event. After that night I did a bit of investigating and brain picking. I was somewhat amazed by what I learned. This edition of “The Odyssey” is the sharing of some of those observations with you. In order to keep this article short, I am going to concentrate on non verbal flirting this time.
I have learned that not all flirting is created equal, flirting takes on a life of its own, has many meanings as well as many faces, there are many forms of flirting and is usually always interpreted by all who see it differently, depending on the mood of the viewer. Interestingly enough, flirting does not always bring the desired results. I found this not only amazing but was surprised by it.
When guys flirt they are conveying one or more of the following; “a sexy hello”, “another way of showing an interest”, OR “hey sexy follow me”, “you are hot”, “I am bored come keep me company”, “Look at me, I am the hottest man in this place”, “do you want to dance?” These are just a few of the responses I got from the men when I asked them what they think or mean when they flirt. No, I am not kidding!
Now let me give you some women’s personal interpretation and feelings about the men flirting with them; “He must be into me”, “I may have a chance with him”, “ he is not bad”, “what a pompous conceited ass“, “he must think he is God’s gift to all the women in this room”, “Is he for real”, “what a player”, “what does he want”, and my all time favorite “is that a flirty look or does he have a twitch?”. No, I did not make these up!
When a lady flirts men usually always take it as “she wants me”! I have been told repeatedly (by men of course) that men are very simple creatures. The more I know about men and the more men I talk with the more complicated men become to me. It appears only men see their species this way. However this interpretation by men when a woman flirts with them seems to be the general consensus. As a woman I do understand that as very simple indeed. Women are much more complicated. I am still laughing over what men think when a woman flirts with him.
Along with these non verbal flirts there is always body language that speaks louder than either non verbal or verbal flirting. I love to watch and study people’s body language, it is so much more interesting to me than what a person is usually saying verbally. Plus, body language is much more honest than words.
Here is what I believe and suggest regarding flirting, when you choose to flirt with someone make sure the recipient is not only open to your flirting but is receiving the message you are really putting out there.
An example of what I mean by this is; I had a woman tell me that she really felt this one guy was very into her because of the sexy looks he kept giving her and his asking her to dance every time they saw each other. His constant flirting kept her thinking he would eventually ask her on a date. She later found out this guy is a notorious flirt and looks at lots of women that way.
Unfortunately all of these women really believed this guy was seriously into them. The fact is this guy is only a flirt and truly means nothing by it. To him it is most likely only an ego boost. These women didn’t see it that way at all. Now, mostly they all think he is a major player. It may or may not be true…..remember it is how a person is perceived that can make a difference. But one can see how this misinterpretation can be problematic at times.
In short, being aware of who you are flirting with and how the message is being received is the responsible, adult and correct thing to do. Flirting can and does send out mixed messages….. I know none of us what to play that game!!
Our calendar is full of events designed for the purpose of meeting and having fun with other singles. Get out there & enjoy what we have scheduled for YOUR enjoyment. SOCIALIZE…..SOCIALIZE…..SOCIALIZE!!!
REMINDER…. email me with any tidbits……just remember, my only requirements are: any and all feedback, information, tidbits, gossip, etc., be accurate, honest, clean and on the positive side. Continue with your emails. I love them! Send them to me at emily@SinglesOdyssey.org.
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SEE ALL OF YOU AT OUR NEXT EVENT……GO TO CALENDAR NEXT.